The Sweet Shop and the Roller Skate

Metaphors for a new year

Hey there! Happy New Year.

Yes, I know we’re 10 days in already, but surely I’m not the only one feeling like they need to take a minute to get their feet back under them?

In fact, that’s part of why it’s taken until now to write to you.

I couldn’t find the words. I’ve been all full of feelings. I didn’t want to add to the inbox overwhelm you were probably already experiencing (because I know I was). And I’ve been trying to figure out what I’m doing and where I’m going with this space, and the bigger picture of my work, for the coming year.

Where I’ve ended up, in this moment at least, is with two metaphors to explore that give a picture of how I’m entering 2023. And as I can’t decide which one to go with, I’m going to share both, and we’ll see where we end up.

The first is the sweet shop.

(And this is unashamedly borrowed and expanded from a conversation with my dear friend Helen, who writes at Midlife Soul Shares, over the weekend).

The proper old fashioned kind of sweet shop with rows and rows, floor to ceiling, of clear-fronted, screw-top jars of every kind of treat in a myriad of shapes, colours, and flavours.

Photo by Eva Wilcock on Unsplash

There are so many of your favourites, each equally mouth-wateringly appealing, but you’ve been told you can only pick one kind.

Just one.

An impossible decision!

But if you love each of them the same, then surely it won’t matter which one you choose, right? Because you know you’re going to enjoy it.

Ah, but what if you make the wrong choice?

What if the one you thought you wanted turns out to be not as wonderful as you hoped, and you wish you’d picked something else? What if you get home and you’re just not in the mood for that one after all? What if something new and different would have been even better?

This is how I’m feeling as we emerge blinking into the new year – faced with a mountain of exciting possibilities, lists full of dreams and tentatively forming plans, and an imagination bursting at the seams with desires and visions of a shining future. And every single one of them tugging at my heart to be answered, followed, brought to life.

And that same fear of getting it wrong if I start with one thing instead of another. The ever-present panic of there not being enough time to do everything. The insidious tentacles of overwhelm waiting to drag me down.

But alongside all that is my multi-passionate soul slightly desperately trying to come up with a way for me to enjoy a taste of it all. Maybe the sweet shop – and the process – needs a re-brand.

I’ll come back to that thought.

Because I want to touch on the second metaphor before I do, and this one arose from the Acceleration card catapulting itself out of the deck a few mornings ago.

Acceleration card from the Practical Magic Activation Deck

With it’s Let’s Go! attitude that echoes so much of the new year rhetoric we’re exposed to, it felt like an over-excited urging to get on with takings, set off at full pelt, and go after those dreams before I missed the chance.

I mean, it’s an enticing image. Of freewheeling into a bold new life, the wind in my hair, a smile on my face, ready to take on the world.

But also…kind of exhausting.

I mean really, I can’t keep up that kind of pace for too long.

Which got me thinking.

Have you ever learned to roller skate?

I tried teaching myself many years ago in a flush of enthusiasm at university. Let’s just say it didn’t go well, and those shiny new skates were quickly making their way to a new home via Ebay.

Because it’s hard.

And unless you’re one of those singularly gifted people who just takes to these things like a duck to water you’re highly unlikely to be performing acrobatic tricks on your first day.

It takes time. Practice. Patience. Repetition.

Gradually building your skills and finding your balance.

Taking a few wobbling steps forwards and then falling and scraping your knees. And getting back up to try again.

Over and over again.

And then even when you think you’ve mastered the basics there are different techniques to learn, and you start each one of them as a beginner again.

And even when you’ve been doing it for years and think you can do it with your eyes closed, something will distract you or cross your path and you’ll end up in a bruised, embarrassed, despairing heap on the floor.

For me, this metaphor relates to my intentions moving forward with my business. It’s taken a backseat over the past few months as I’ve focused on other things, and honestly, needed the space to get things clearer for myself. I took a relatively long break from posting on Instagram, and getting back in that saddle has been a gradual process of rediscovering my voice and my visual style, and finding that visibility has fallen away to nearly nothing in my absence.

I’ve been either fully or partially self-employed for six years now, and in that time have dabbled to a greater or lesser extent in most of the core business functions from product and service design, photography, copywriting, website design, marketing, client management, finances, and all the other bits and pieces that nobody ever tells you you’ll have to learn. So I actually have a reasonable amount of experience, and some skills, in these practicalities. But having taken the break, they’re a bit rusty. And with that comes a dip in confidence. And a few false starts while I remember what I’m doing, and begin to hone my progress again.

So where does this leave me with the sweet shop and the roller skate then?

Well. The roller skate is the reminder that as tempting as it might be to go full speed ahead – or equally, to give up because it’s too difficult and dangerous – I’m highly likely to do much better if I look at it as a learning experience, one where practice will lead to improvements, and minor stumbles are all part of the process. One day I will be there, joyfully freewheeling along, and even thinking about taking things to another, even more exciting level.

And the sweet shop. That’s getting a re-brand as a pick ‘n’ mix counter. Where I get to choose a rainbow mixture of delights every time I visit.

Not in the style of the bags you fill at the cinema only to shovel handfuls blindly into your mouth in the dark while your eyes are transfixed by the action on screen.

This is a mindful and intentional pick ‘n’ mix. One designed for savouring. That lets me discover new combinations, and new favourites, with each experience.

Where I don’t have to choose just one thing and stick to it, but can get curious about how different ones might work together, can revisit preferred mixtures or introduce something new when it feels right, and most importantly, can enjoy a full, varied, and vibrant bag full of joy!

In real world terms, this intention and approach of a pick ‘n’ mix and learning experience is going to look like quite a bit of experimenting.

Trying things and seeing what works. Putting offers out there, giving them a chance, and then adjusting if need be.

And drawing on greater courage and trust in myself, to keep taking those steps forward, getting up again after the inevitable falls, and knowing that everything is progress.

Of course, this is also a journey that I hope to support you on, in whatever form that might take – to keep learning, keep getting to know yourself better, keep trying new things, keep embracing all that you are and all the possibilities of your life’s story.

So in the spirit of taking a brave step (and because a bit of accountability always helps!) I’m telling you now that the next time you hear from me I will be announcing the first of several ways you’ll be able to work with me in the coming months.

The plans are coming together, I’m excited by their potential, and I can’t wait to share them with you.

OK, OK, I’ll give you a little hint: think stories, circles, and of course, magic!

Until next time dear friends x

(P.S anyone else really fancy a bag of pick ‘n’ mix sweets now?! And what would be included in your bag? Let me know in the comments!)